An Ephesians 4:29 Wife!

Well, I blew it today. Okay, so that might be an exaggeration, but I said something to my husband today that I wish I could take back. We have been blessed with three children in three years and so there are a lot of sippy cups in our house. A lot. My OCD nature rears its ugly little head when pairing up the cups with their tops. Each lid is a specific color that matches perfectly with one cup. Sure, they can be mixed and matched, but I prefer certain lids on certain cups. For the past several weeks the blue lid  has never ended up on its proper cup because my (truly wonderful) husband put the cup together while getting the children a drink or emptying the dishwasher. Finally, the rotations of the cups ended up so that in the dishwasher I had the blue cup and the blue lid! I ran the dishwasher before bed knowing that in the morning the cup and the lid would be clean at the same time and I was excited to finally reunite them!

While my husband was getting our son's breakfast ready this morning he picked up the first cup and the first lid he found in the dishwasher. Blue lid/green cup. I didn't realize it until later when I was unloading the rest of the dishwasher. I seriously groaned to myself when I saw that the blue lid was already in use with an "improper" cup. I wasn't mad, per se, but a little frustrated. Jokingly I said to my husband, "For future reference, this blue top goes with this blue cup." There, I had said it. I was going to be proactive in educating him and hopes that it would solve the problem.

It took about two minutes after I spoke those words for me to realize how pointless it had been for me to verbalize them. Jason didn't know about how over the past several weeks the lack of this particular cup/lid combo was driving me nuts. I had kept that to myself because I didn't want to be a nagging wife. Even today when I did mention it, I did not yell or criticized him, but I spoke without thinking and my words did nothing to build up or edify my husband or our marriage.

Ephesians 4:29 says, "Do not let any unwholesome talk come out of your mouths, but only what is helpful for building others up according to their needs, that it may benefit those who listen." It is relatively "easy" for me to live by the first part of this verse. I don't use curse words and I try hard not to partake in gossip. Yet, today I realized that I pretty much ignore the second part of this verse. Was my comment helpful in building my husband up? No. Did it benefit him in any way? No.  So, in keeping in line with Scripture, should I have said it? No.

Oh, how I wish I could have these reflections and conversations with myself before I open my mouth to speak. Especially when it comes to conversations with my husband. I didn't say anything nasty or disrespectful today, but my words did not build him up and they only fed my frustration. I should have thanked him for getting breakfast for the children this morning instead of focusing on which cup he used.  If I had thanked him for being an involved father, then my words would have benefited him and it would have helped me focus on the positive!

Starting today, I am striving to be an Ephesians 4:29 wife! Who's with me?!

I am linking this post to:
http://unveiledwife.com/how-to-avoid-bickering-in-marriage-link-up-party